right now..i wanna whine about my hands that are turning rough from the dishes that i have to wash and the clothes that i have to wash and the floor that i have to clean and the room that i have to dust.i hate household chores.household chores are not made for me.and that's what every other person claims too.but at the end of the day we still have to get our ass down to doing it.unless we are freaking rich and have truckloads of money and houseful of maids.

so u think having a houseful of maids helps to relieve you of stress?i say bullshit.it causes more stress.why?because these people are as farked up as the rest of the world too.instead of just doing their bloody household chores.they have to stir some dumb trouble.they have MAID POLITICS.i say what the fuck.just stick to your bloody cleaning or whoever you have to take care of and stop stirring uneccessary trouble.don't believe me?go to my house and check it out.

i have a freaking sleeping problem.i sleep at 5am and i wake up at 12.or whatever time it is that is 15 mins before my lesson.and i rush to the toilet to shower and run to the bus stop to catch the isb.and run to class.and am 10 mins late.if not i don't turn up for class at all.i'm screwed up.

what's wrong with this world?what's wrong with people?have they got no freaking brains?!do their brains and mouths not work together?do our brains no longer control our mouths?!everyone should just turn mute i swear.then maybe we'll have world peace.because WORDS have the highest potential to HURT and CAUSE TROUBLE.so to all those who go off speaking without thinking..go get some fucking brains bitches and assholes.

and i bet you are all thinking the same of me now.

oh.congrats to all who did well for your As and Os

last night i had a dream..a beautiful dream.
i dreamt we were kids playing on a beach.
with the sun high up in the sky
and the big waves rushing up the shore..
we were playing catching and hide-n-seek
full of innoncence.. without sorrows or worries
we were laughing and having a time of our lives
enjoying the moment..and not bothered about what tomorrow might bring...

..........and then i woke up in shock...
and i suffered a bigger shock...
i was late for class.
happiness seems to always be shortlived.

i have tonsillitis - which is the inflammation of the tonsils...duh.
so now i can hardly swallow..and there's a freaking lump in my throat and it's constantly giving me a headache or should i say migraine.
but...still i went to eat prata just now.
the penicillin's just killing me. it's giving me major hunger pangs, and i think i'm gonna suffer from gastric pain. my stomach's gonna eat itself out.

right now...i really don't care if i die...because insanity's catching up, and i don't want to go crazy.

maybe its time to turn the tables.

i'm touched...by all who msged me to ask if i was better. be it by phone or online...i feel so loved. and i'm even more touched...because ang ying ying offered to pass me vitamin c tmr. haha...seriously...i'm really touched.i don't know what else to say...thank you all of you =) oh yes...of course my lovely mummy too..who came in to cover me with a blanket and brought water up for me.and my dear FF of a sister who couldn't wait to contract some of my germs so that she could skip school...and who introduced me to the SIMs!!! u are trying to make me not do my homework!!

i really don't think i asked for much....

harry (lim ban teck) just sent me a poem...and it's really the sweetest thing ever...especially since its coming from him...i never knew he could write...and i have to put his full name...because...he said i had to..simple as that. haha!

Heart’s been broken, tears been shed.
For a love that was given but not kept.

No more joy, only pain,
And sadness in the pouring rain.

Time has past, wounds have healed,
Thoughts that hurt now buried and sealed

Nights have gone, dreams been made,
With your image still in my head.

Tried to move on and forget,
But didn’t want to live with this regret.

All I ask is a chance, just one.
To share your burdens as they come.

To be the one you run to when the going gets tough,
And when the world doesn't seem fair enough.

Sharing your happiness, loving your silliness,
Through the years of loneliness.

Promises of love forever and eternal,
Can only be found in the script of a fairytale.

All I can do is hope and pray,
That when my hair turns white and yours turn grey,

We’ll still be holding hands at the end of the day.

btw..don't even think about copying it or doing whatever pirate thing u can with it...because it's HIS poem...i'll chop whoever, who does that!

fatty bom bom's unhappy

it's time to wallow in self-pity.
it's a saturday night...and i'm in the hostel..facing the laptop since 12..trying to get my essay going somewhere...
itz 7pm now...and i'm eating cup noodles for dinner, when normally i should be home with this huge spread shouting out at me from the dinner table
there's not a single soul left in the hostel..and i'm just damn bored...my only other remaining hostel mate's been gone for 3 nights and i have no friends...i'm a loner! :( and i'm gonna turn autistic just like what charlene said...and i'm probably suffering from depression cause i have no one to talk to and i've been in a bad mood since this morning...and when i thought i found someone to cheer me up...it didn't turn out the way i hoped it would.

but.....

my day just got better...because dear jin just called me from candy empire and asked me if i wanted anything. and i'm seriously touched...i "cried"..haha! =) thanx a lot jin! u really made my horrid day much better...just as i was close to tears and close to suffering from insanity (i'm serious..)! now i can't wait for monday to get my jellybeans and lifesavers that i've been waiting for weeks for!

and.....

dear kunies...thanks for last night too! i'm sure if i had stayed in...i'd definitely be in a worse shape now! "closer" next week babe!

i'll never stay in on a weekend ever again....

what do u do when ur carton of milk gets frozen in the intelligent common fridge..and u really have to have ur cereal...but all u have are un-chilled cans of milo?

1. pour ur cereal into a bowl
2. dunk in 5 ice cubes
3. pour in a can of milo....
4. tada!...u have ur cereal!

fatty bom bom's ingenious breakfast recipe.

speaking problem

many people have a serious problem...not knowing when to shut up...some people

1. don't know the principle of listening and not telling
2. are just way too talkative and aren't exactly very entertaining
3. don't know how to keep their thoughts to themselves
4. practise preferential treatment...and give out different comments to different people in the same context(hence are better off not speaking)
5. don't know when to stop making fun of people
6. don't know when their words are hurting others
7. don't know thatwhen people tell them to shut up...they really mean it
8. don't get the hint to shut up when people switch seats coz they talk too freaking much

the first two ...are the two things that totally piss me off currently..i don't deny that i am talkative too...but i think i do keep check of myself constantly...think before you speak.

a relationship between two people is just like a clap.
like they always say...it takes two hands to clap..
you cannot produce a clap with only one hand can you?
when two hands do not come into contact with each other, a clap cannot be produced...just like in a relationship..without two people..one cannot happen.
when one hand tries harder than the other, a dull sound is produced...in a relationship...when one tries harder than the other, it remains dull and stagnant, and is almost pointless.
hence...a good relationship can and will only occur when both parties put in an equal effort...likewise..a resonant clap can only be produced when two hands cooperate.

....so would you choose to be the hand that tries...or the one that refuses to?

finally stepped into zouk after a whole mth!no more clubbing till after exams! :( last night was super fun once again!met loads of people there ...but a few ppl were pretty much gone by the start of the night...haha...once again i got stepped on until my feet were black...horrid girls and their heels..i shall take my revenge one day!

as always...jin's n jean's 'milkshake act' sent me into fits of laughter!!

u know u are high on alcohol(long island tea still sucks!)...when u start talking to someone whom u dislike...but well..i aim to be a better person this yr...so i guess that's a pretty good start!

think i spent most of the time talking and laughing instead of dancing...but it was fun!

disappointed with you.....

poofed!

this week has been ultimately hectic and horrid...
presentation on thurs and fri
and i spent the whole week preparing for them
sleeping at 4am and waking up for classes that last from 10 to 8 are ultimate killers..
i spent most of the daylight hours in school and my waking hours doing work this week...i myself can't believe i survived it all!
i'm totally burnt out...i don't have a single ounce of strength left in me
i can't wait for 2pm tmr...and i'll rest the whole weekend if i can afford it!
the next 10 days are dedicated to my term paper..which i haven't started yet...there goes my hols...:(

i'm glad that i'm not the only one who thinks and feels that way...i found 3 other like minded people today...and it just made my day! i'm happy that i now have people to bitch with, and that i'm not alone in this misery! har har har! so ultimately...u are still the blind fool.

a friend whom i've been missing very much sent a msg to me today to say hello and to ask how i was...i couldn't help but smile like an idiot to myself the moment i saw the sender...i was thrilled!

oc ep 12 is the saddest ever...the oc used to give me hope...but even the oc is giving up on itself...it made me cry...sandy and kirsten...the saddest of all...people watch oc for ryan's and seth's love story or to bitch about marissa (...i do tt too)...i watch it for sandy and kirsten...and i was devastated just now...but nonetheless...tt 45 mins dosage of entertainment made my oh-so-dull day better

it's simple things like these that make my 'down in the dumps' days seem brighter....

ohhh...i'm so damn pissed now i could commit murder!! i was minding my own business and walking along this WIDE path along AS6 to collect notes...when this GIRL walked pass me with her arms swinging WIDELY...and she whacked her bloody watch into mine and cracked the face of my watch!!!!!! what is her fucking problem seriously!??!?!? if i can remember her face...i swear i will bring her to the highest building in nus right now and push her off it!!! if she was wearing shorts and slippers or something...i would have forgiven her...but no! she was fucking wearing a skirt and walking like a man!!! who the hell walks with their arms swinging so widely?! BITCH! to all those who think girls who wear skirts are feminine...i say BULLSHIT!...what the hell! didn't her mother teach her how to walk?! bitch man...seriously bitch! i've worn this watch for the past 5 years and she has to come along and whack it with her freaking cheap watch and break mine! if her watch is a rolex...i'll definitely forgive her...but seriously..judging from the way she walked...i doubt she's able to own one...pay me back my 179 bucks for my watch bitch!!!!

so to YOU!...u are a FUCKING BITCH!!! go and fucking learn how to walk!! who the fuck taught u to walk with ur arms swinging so widely?! and the path was so fucking big why did u have to squeeze next to me and whack my watch?! if you don't know how to walk like a girl..don't dress like one bitch!!! millions of curses to you!!!

and i just realised..she didn't even stop to appologise....SLUT!!

i read the words over and over again...but they just seemed like words and nothing else.i didn't know how to feel...i didn't know what to make of them...i'm lost and trying to find the meaning from them all....

my favourite bunch of people... T3!...short of elise(who was late..), elaine and hilly...

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY MEH-LOH-DEE!!!!!!!
All the Best for the year ahead...and we'll get a big fat A for our jap mass media project!!!hahahha!!

i'm a fatty fatty bom bom...
pigging out has never felt better...
endless supply of peanut butter cookies...pineapple tarts...kueh buloh and rabbit sweets...
cans after cans of orange juice...
abalone, prawns, sea cucumber, stewed mushrooms, sharks fin soup, scallops, big fat whole chickens, juicy big fat whole ducks, huge steamed fish.....
agar-agar, home-made carrot cake, curry chicken, sushi, chicken wings, cereal prawns, fishballs, sotong balls, fried rice, fried noodles, half-boiled eggs, hard-boiled eggs, ching-teng...
yum yum yum!!
big fat ang pows...big fat pockets...big fat bank accounts...KA-CHING!!$$$$

well well...look how cny turned out this year?? pretty good in comparison to the past few years!don't you just feel good when u are prepared for a bad time...but then there's an unexpected turn of events?? now..this is what i like about pessimism...laadeedaa...t3 steamboat tmr...can't wait!!

waves of sadness rushes through her heart...
bringing back the fear of the past...
the fear of falling into depression once again...
putting on a huge smile...she pushes away the thought...
and tries hard to concentrate on positive things..
nope...
she'll never fall back into that never-ending abyss of hopelessness ever again....

i was eating my reunion dinner at this kok restaurant in a pte function room..when this girl walked into the room and went HELLO! to this other table full of ppl...and then my sis nudged me and went...aye!sun yan zi's sister...so ...i looked up...and i went...WHAT?! IT'S SUN YAN ZI HERSELF!!! haha...ok...i don't know why am i so excited...i'm not a fan of hers...but anyway...i just had to blog about it...to make those of you who are her fan JEALOUS...hoho....

and yj....congrats...u sneaky weaky...sly person *wink wink* hahahhahahahhaha

*burp*.....HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!

clever businesswomen and their good services

there's this shop along chinatown's upper cross street run by a group of aunties who sell superb chicken noodles/you ji mian...they are what i call intelligent businesswomen...
to cater to the cny crowd...they came up with a drive-by service(yup..just like Macs!)...all u have to do is just illegaly park along the road..and they'll take ur order and hand u the chicken right away...chopped/unchopped/whole/half...whichever way u want it!
i'm impressed....and so were my parents...heh!

my good friend has been saying that i've become very violent and vulgar recently...i don't exactly agree...i really hate to swear...but i'm sorry i have to this time......

to the person who stole my 'disaster area' sign right off my door: i hope you fucking burn in hell you assholic cheapskate!!!! can't u go buy one on ur own?!?!? grrrrr!!! just happily and rudely pluck it off my door right! basketball! u sickening conniving thief! don't let me find out who you are.......u won't see daylight anymore i swear!

a yummy brownie and a glass of milk for breakfast...totally made my day
milk never tasted so good before...
MILK:

• gives you strong bones and healthy teeth
• gives you more nutrients than any other drink
• contains - calcium, protein, vitamin A, B-12, D, potassium, phosphorous, niacin, and riboflavin
• prevents osteoporosis
• with the right diet..it'll help u to lose weight
• and... to all my not so tall friends...it helps you GROW =)

so....GOT MILK?? www.whymilk.com

henceforth...officially a milk addict...i'll aim to drink a glass a day...but pray i do not grow any taller!

i never knew that J.M Barrie was the author of Peter Pan...and i didn't know that Finding Neverland was the movie about his life....till i just checked it out on imdb.com..and there i was thinking that it's so cool that the children in the play have the same name as the kids...such a pleasant and dreamy show =) it was worth my $8.50

have you ever been in a state where u are so contented that u are just living in this land of your own, and u just smile to yourself all the time? you're in this constant dream mode and you can hardly hear what the people around you are talking about, you can't be bothered about what's going on in your surrounding, and you just go around in a pleasant daze? i was there tonight.

have you ever sought after a land where you will remain a kid forever?a land without sorrows and worries...a land where you spend your days dreaming and having fun? a land with pirates, fairies, mermaids, red indians and flying children...neverland...that's what it is! as stupid as it may seem...ever since the day tt i watched peter pan when i was a kid...i've always dreamt about going to neverland and staying there..though i know it does not exist.i've always wanted to live there and not have to grow up....in fact...my ambition as a kid was to be a red indian...what kinda ambition is that anyway???haha...well..i hope i find neverland soon..maybe it's that dreamy land where only u exist in.where nothing in the world can affect you.where you are just contented with that dreamy emptiness...that state of mind whereby your mind is just blank in a pleasant manner...in other words...stonning.

J.M. Barrie: You can visit Neverland anytime you like.
Peter Llewelyn Davies: How?
J.M. Barrie: By believing Peter, Just believe.

"You find a glimmer of happiness in this world, there's always someone who wants to destroy it. "

i'm finding neverland......

i've been constantly checking the forum of this particular geog module of mine...and i was wondering why the hell was everyone guessing where our lecturer's from...and some people even gave a super detailed analyis of the England map...and the direction he probably ventured off in while he was a youth and the places he settled in....and i was thinking to myself..."god...are these people too free or are they insane?! why are they doing such retarded stuff???" and then i finally found the answer...some kind soul decided to post a new entry in the forum..and apparently there's this contest in the geog department website...and the challenge was to guess where he was from..and there were clues!!and the prize was a box of chocolates -_-"

so anyway...i suddenly feel damn stupid..because i wish i was able to analyse the map like how those peopl have done...but sorry i think i am too dumb to be able to achieve that(can just hear people screaming.."BUT YOU ARE A GEOG MAJOR!!!")...but i guess i'll give it a try when i'm free. and ...my initial impression of them being retarded has transformed into admiration...i admire them for having the drive to look up the map....for posting their comments on the forum...and for even bothering about the contest. i think i should be more active.....but i know i'll just talk talk talk and not do anything in the end...HAHA! well...i'll try my best to.....

i suddenly recalled how my pri sch "friend" almost ran me over with her nissan whatever...and it pissed me off...bitch...J.L...hated u since pri sch and still hate u now....don't u freaking know what's a pedestrian crossing!?if u want to run me over with ur car...at least drive a bmw couppe or something...don't use ur junk ass of a nissan to do it!

===========

we were talking about various subjects the other day...and we came to a particular one that we agreed is definitely not difficult to study...but is just extremely urk! and then we also came to the conclusion that those people doing it...seriously think they are a bunch of elites and they just think they are UP THERE. so here's what i have to say to u all...u're not any smarter than any of us...it just so happen that u do not have the same interest as the rest of us...so stop being such snobs...and we definitely do not see eye to eye...because u all definitely do not see the humanistic and artistic side of life...u all have ur own reasoning and we have ours...we respect urs...so do the same too...stop dismissing our ideas and trying to plant ur thoughts in us...stop thinking of us as ridiculous bunch of idiots with artsy dumb logics and thinkings...because we are not...assholes!

alright...enough bitching...this is a sign that i need to sleep...

cny is next week..and i just realised today that i only have sch on monday next week!!how fantastic?!?!

speaking of cny...i had this pretty funny conversation with my cousin just now. we were complaining about how boring cny is..and if not for the ang pows...we really can't be bothered about this festive season. then...we both came up with the best idea ever...if only ang pows could be posted to us..then cny will just be fabulous!i say...we are geniuses..great minds think alike!haha...damn...i really hate cny...and all those horrid cny songs!grr...if not for the ang pows and the new clothes that i get to buy...i think i wld really ignore this festive season...which brings me to another pt...it's a FESTIVE SEASON...how ironic...i don't find it very enjoyable.......

i can just predict our itinerary man.....
HOW BORING!i wish i had more happening relatives :(
and to a certain someone ...STOP FREAKING GIVING ME 4 BUCKS! YOU'VE BEEN GIVING ME 4 BUCKS SINCE THE DAY I WAS BORN!HAVEN'T U HEARD OF INFLATION?!u CHEAPSKATE!! btw...the 3 of us have already blacklisted u!

How To Be Dead - Snow Patrol

Please don't go crazy, if I tell you the truth
No you don't know what happened
And you never will if
You don't listen to me while I talk to the wall
This blanket is freezing, it's been out in the hall
Where you've had me for hours
Till I'm sure what I want
But darling I want the same thing that I wanted before
So sweetheart tell me what's up I won't stop no way

Please keep your hands down
And stop raising your voice
It's hardly what I'd be doing if you gave me a choice
It's a simple suggestion can you give me sometime
So just say yes or no
Why can't you shoulder the blame
Coz both my shoulders are heavy
From the weight of us both
You're a big boy now so let's not talk about growth
You've not heard a single word I have said...
Oh, my God

Please take it easy it can't all be my fault
I haven't made half the mistakes
That you've listed so far
Oh baby let me explain something
It's all down to drugs
At least I remember taking the and not a lot else
It seems I've stepped over lines
You've drawn again and again
But if the ecstacy's in the wit is definitely out
Dr. Jekyll is wrestling Hyde for my pride

to the person who wrecked the showerhead of my fav cubicle...and deprived me of my nice baths for three whole weeks coz of tt five horrid "strings" of water that i had to bathe with: YOU'RE AN ASS!

to the person who finally fixed it back: you're LOVELY and you're an ANGEL!

dead tired...gd nite!

Worn Me Down - Rachael Yamagata

Gone - she's gone.
How do you feel about it?
That's what I thought.
You're real torn up about it.
And I wish you the best
I could do without it
And I will because you've worn me down
Oh, I will because you've worn me down

Worn me down like a road.
I did everything you told.
Worn me down to my knees.
I did everything to please you.
But you can't stop thinking about her.
No, you can't stop thinking about her.

And you're wrong.
You're wrong.
I'm not overreacting.
Something is off.
Why don't we ever believe ourselves?
And I, oh I, I feel it more for you.
And I will because you've worn me down.
And I will because you have worn me down.

Worn me down like a road.
I did everything you told.
Worn me down to my knees.
I did everything to please.
But you can't stop thinking about her.
No, you can't stop thinking about her.

---------------
---------------
But I'm so tired of thinking about her, again, tonight.

Worn me down like a road.
I did everything you told.
Worn me down to my knees.
I did everything to please you.

Worn me down like a road.
I did everything you told me to do.
But you, you can't stop thinking about her.
No, you can't stop thinking about her.
No, you can't stop thinking about her.
No, you can't stop thinking of her.

autograph books

the things that holds the memories of all my dear friends...yes it may sound a bit cheesy now...but really...an autograph book was THE thing that u had to have at the end of each school year...or whatever it was that marked a seperation from your buddies! sadly...nobody bothered to bring one during JC days..i guess it might have looked dumb or something.....

flipping through the pages...all the memories of my crazy friends started coming back...friends who've not been present in my life over the recent years...friends whom i've drifted from...and i felt a pang of sadness within me...

as i read each entry...i found myself smiling at the pages...all the funny stuff that was written in there....all the weird stuff that was pasted(plasters, sweet wrappers, the box of a pimple cream(michelle..tt was u..), chewing gum wrappers, matchsticks(?!?!?!) etc)...pages that were burnt, torn, cut up, crumpled, coloured, all for the sake of decoration....pages and pages of the fun times that we had documented in there...photographs of us....nick names and fake details...poems like "birds fly high..hard to catch..friends like u..hard to forget!" or "sianhua sianhua in the air...i can see ur underwear...not too big...not too small...just the size of singapore!" could be found all over the book...HAHA!

and then i really felt like going back to that point in time. the point in time where my only worries were my studies(i was really stupid u see..)...where i only cried when i had to be seperated from my friends,or when i failed my maths test (bah!)...where i only got really angry and started scolding people to their face like once in a loooooooooong time...where i didn't have to try and figure out what others were thinking coz they would just naturally tell me...where i didn't have to try so hard to understand my friends...where everything was just...NICE AND FINE!

ok...not like things are horrid now...but those days were much better i guess...haha...growing up is such a blardee complex thing....tsk....well anyway...after flipping through the book...i finally found what i was looking for...and here's my task for the day....

dear moh moh...i don't think u'll ever read this...but if u do....HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY BABE!!!..i miss the days when i would pluck ur arm hair in class and make you yelp during LIT lesson...and Mrs Koh would just stare at us with her intimidating eyes...the days when we would fall asleep during assembly together or bitch about that yellow big bird on stage.....the days when we mastered the art of talking in class with our teeth clenched and without having to move our lips..all the times we sneaked food to each other under the table...and a million other things that we used to do...hehe..those were the days man...those were the days...hope this will be a spuperb year for ya babe...and love ya loads!! and we gotta meet up soon! haha!


moh moh, mingli, chan, zuoyi and i...the last time we met....2 yrs ago!! =(

sigh...i'm tired of facing angry faces
angry faces with no explanation
i'm trying hard to put the smiles back on...but it's taking it's toll on me
i'm trying hard to not get affected...but i'm failing badly...it's absolutely rubbing off on me..
so PLEASE...whoever u are...SMILE...or at least tell me WHY...coz i don't think i can take it any longer...it's killing the joy in me...it's killing the happy me =(

bring to me to the oc...
where nice men exist...
where loving someone is such a great feeling...
where marriages are sweet and lovely...
where houses are huge and grand...
where lovely clothes exist...
where parties are an everyday thing...
where bagels seem the yummiest...
where fighting is just part and parcel of growing up and understanding each other...
where fighting helps to further reinforce and strengthen relationships...
where people kiss and make up after fights...
where u are obviously 25 but yet can pretend that u are 16...
where everything seems splendid =)

certified...The OC addict....

bumped into a certain someone yest...god..u looked terrible.i must have been blind.

=========

d-e-a-d tired....physically...mentally...emotionally...in every single aspect
6 hours of tutorial straight is no joke...i swear
e only consolation...geog and icm tuts were fun..and i hope they'll be tt way for the rest of the sem
bahasa was extremely disappointing today...expected it to be better...but i guess itz probably coz i was so darn tired...i just blanked out from 715 onwards...didn't even hear yj talking to me..sorry!

i received ur sms...and we made arrangements...and...once again...we didn't meet in the end
this always happens..but well i expected it...don't bother appologising...i'm used to it.

if i didn't give two hoots about many things...i'd be a happier and even more carefree person...not like i'm not already one...but well...i could do with more of both of them!

==========

was reading the blog of a friend whom i was once very close to...i could just imagine myself blogging about all the things she wrote...but alas...it's all a dream...that will never ever come true...

if only we could change our goals to match...

life would then be oh-so-perfect =)

went to smu for their 'patrons day' with kunies, yj and viv today to support xing who had a stall at the bazaar.bought two tees at pretty cheap prices.drank one and a half cup of tiger which was going at a dirt cheap price of 3 bucks per cup. saw my 'fav' friend there.met zh and man there.realised that all the ppl whom i've been wondering "what the hell happened to them?!" were gathered in smu.saw a few unlikable faces.talked to someone and couldn't remember who she was(as usual...what's new...i suck or as viv says...wuck).have to admit that smu is really quite happening.wondered what my life would be like now if i had transferred there...i'll definitely have tons of indian nationals and MICs for good friends.made my great escape before taufik and sly arrived..seriously...i don't give a shit about them!so don't bother promoting them to me..they have to pay me to support them..ok...kunies is going to scold me again!.had a pretty lousy jap dinner.desperate housewives' damn good!.looked at my reading list and almost burst into tears.spent a whole hr printing readings.remembered that i'm supposed to meet my mom for a movie tmr, and i forgot to call her just now. feel damn guilty about it.dead tired.good night.

had fun today though i spent the whole day at home..
felt like i went back to my good old primary school days..
had a pretty good time studying in the car porch with my ff of a sister who was trying to make some sense of her very confusing biology homework....
there we sat..scratching our heads at the difficult content and screaming at our books as we shared ritz bitz cheese crackers, a mini aero bar and "fought" for the better tasting jelly beans....driving each other nuts by rocking the table while writing or shaking our legs, or by constantly repeating "shaking that ass" and humming "star spangled banners..
talking rubbish...dragging out shoes from the shoe cupboard and parading around the car porch in them ...and smsing rubbish to the other for the fun of it (i did that) when we got bored!
then.. we decided to invite bala to join us in the fun...so we made a looooong distance call to melly-borny and talked rubbish...laughing over ned kelly, nigel water bottles, in your dreams buddy, have you seen my daughter and like i care bullocks..for 21 mins...haha...there goes ur calling card bala!
and now...we get to watch tv downstairs till the wee hours because someone's not coming home tonight...hohoho!!

what a pleasant and simple day this has been...if only all weekends were like that =)

0217..suddenly thought of something that's constantly being mentioned these days...VALENTINE'S DAY...it's here again...
friends have been going on about how sad they are that they have no one special to celebrate it with...while others have been filling me in, on the surprises that they have planned for their special someone...as for me...it's been the same all along...v-day's so insignificant...i can't even remember the exact date. i think i've asked for the exact date for what...5 times in 2 days??? its just like any other day i guess
i'm reminded of those days in PL when everyone wld come to sch with chocolates, small little presents, flowers, cards, heart-shaped stuff for each other...and though it's an all girls sch...v-day was still splendid and enjoyable..coz of how we all loved each other (no lesbianism involved here...) =)
but things just changed after PL...v-days weren't like how they used to be...couples will rejoice..and singles will just go around feeling down....which i think's really sad.......
but anyway.....to all my single friends....v-day's also known as FRIENDSHIP DAY! so....let's all go out together...and eat, drink and be merry!! why bother about singlehood when we've got each other??hehe...ok....easier said than done...but anyway...no worries ya all..i say...the time will come...yes it will come..

wishing things were like how they were before.......

oh...i watched a walk to remember again today...6th time!!

what does it feel like, to have to pick cans from a dustbin for a living...and yet not be able to afford to taste the drink inside?

==========

you only realise how much you love someone...when u are seperated from the person...

crap shit semester

what a crap shit semester...
i thought that taking bahasa would be fun...but it totally screwed up my timetable
now i have a blardee 5 day week...and i have classes till 8pm on mon and thurs...and on even weeks i only have class from 6 to 8 pm on thursdays...
seriously...i hate swearing...but this time i have to say it......what the fark man!!
this somehow feels even worse than in jc when i had to go to sch at 6.30am in the morning and stay till 7pm almost everyday...
never ever have i had classes on fri..and now...poor melody and i have a stupid jackass 1 hr class at 9am for jap mass media...EVERY WEEK! so farking screwed up! i hate cors!!! jackasses!
nus is such a bitch!

other than crap shit timetable....today was pretty fun

went for archery with hil and jin...it was damn tiring!
convinced that we were legolas...we tried our best to hit the bullseye...and we weren't too bad i have to say...at least we hit the yellow rim! hil suffered two injuries...which she didn't even realise till jin pointed them out to her! jin shot one balloon...and we all won sunblocks!..except hil of course...coz she left early..hoho..jin...we really should have taken pics! just like the time we went for the intro course for fencing! haha!

ALFIE...
the man who can captivate any woman...
the man who refuses to commit...
the man who has women eating out of his hands...
the man who can make women do things for him willingly...
the man who did not appreciate all the things women did for him
the man who was left with no one at the end of the day..because all the women realised that he wasn't worth it afterall...u get what u give

......the extremely good looking and drool-worthy jude law...

2 new pairs of shoes

very humourous parents have i
one said my shoes were so big i could walk on water with them
another said my shoes were so big they looked like dragon boats
an even funnier sister i have
"u can use your shoes to bail the water out of your sinking boat"
OR
"u can drink from your shoes"

thanks....it's really not my fault that i have big feet...

back from siying's 21st party! it was pretty grand, but yet nice and simple at the same time. she held it at the meridien hotel in changi, and had it buffet style. man...she received a whole load of presents...and the biggest one of all...a microwave oven! which she's gonna put in her hostel...haha..so now her room's filled up by her fridge,microwave and tv...and i'm gonna spend more time there! haha! kidding!

anyway...hey babe....HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY!!!you looked super hot today!hahaha!

yj and i were discussing what to wear the whole afternoon...and 2 hrs before the party she called me to tell me, my true love said that everyone there's wearing super formally...like prom dresses and shirt and pants! so the both of us started panicking...and then i started regretting that i did not buy the p.o.a dress yest! then i had to go all the way out to buy a pair of black heels coz i didn't have one...so after two hours of panicking...we finally found stuff to wear.....and this is what we both went to the party in........

now...to all those who have been going on for ages of how you've never seen me in a skirt...or how i do not wear skirts...who says so?! here.....now you've seen me in one...and you've got nothing more to say...hmmph!haha!


me, siying and yj

...yj...mission accomplised ya?!haha!

i'm home again! i'm home again! i have nothing else better to do! so i'm blogging for the 2nd time in a day..and right after i posted my first!hohoho!i came home just in time to catch the episode of joe ma dying in my favourite tv drama serial! i couldn't stop crying while watching it =( anyway...one of the characters brought up a point that i thought was pretty true...people always say that we should fight for the ones we love. that we shouldn't give up so easily. but...what's the point in fighting...when you know that the other person won't love you back? isn't it just a waste of time...and creating sadness and misery for yourself?

==========

zouk 2 nights ago was very fun! one of the best times ever =) i was wandering around alone for like 5 to 10 mins between phuture and zouk looking for a familiar face... and all of sudden..someone screamed into my ear at zouk! i turned around to face siying n yuguo..both extremely high at that pt i must add!followed them to the dance floor and there i found hobz and her whole grp of friends...and a while later hildra and shiau hui appeared with a whole bunch of unknown people..who turned out to be a really hilarious and crazy bunch of people! saw a few more familiar faces through the rest of the night...first time that this has ever happened!heh..how exciting!..ok sounds bimbotic..but anyway...i really had fun though i kinda expected not to, at the start of the night =)

=========

i got a belated birthday/christmas present today...a very lovely fossil watch =) haha...it's so pretty! i wore it for a whole hour..while i was at home! hahahahahha...and now it's resting in it's nice tin box. once again..thanks cootie!i'll try my best to save up for you know what....

to: a very good friend..who has retarded response on msn...

this entry's 2 days late....
mel n i were chatting one fine wed afternoon, and we suddenly started talking about this very good friend of ours (who by the way...still has mel's vokda in her house...). as we were yakking...one of us brought up the topic of how our dear friend takes donkey kong years to reply on msn...so this entry is specially dedicated to our dear friend...

you know who you are...

here goes..
our dear friend...is normally either not online,or on away mode.once in a while if we are lucky, she will msg us to say hi..and after talking for a few mins, she will go off to play her gunbound or whatever it is, or to watch her television...and then we won't hear from her for a horridly long time!i must say something though...mel...you are definitely much luckier than me..because she never replies you. on the other hand..when she replies to my messages..these are the usual contents..."!!!!!", or "can you not be an idiot????","go and die la!!!" or...her latest favourite phrase..."MORON!!!!"...thanks. in circumstances like these...i would say that..silence is much better! haha...

so our dear friend...mel and i have come to the conclusion that...EITHER..you reply our msgs quickly/stop calling me a moron...OR..we will make u wear a lime green vest that says "I MUST LEARN TO COMMUNICATE WITH MY FRIENDS", and make you parade down orchard road as a form of public embarrassment.hahaha...alright..that's the end of this special entry. aren't you touched??!?!??!?! hehe...

i sense a huge "MORON" coming my way......

couldn't get up today...super duper late for lecture...but no loss...it was hell boring! the lecturer didn't know how to get the comp working...so he went on for like a whole 10 to 15 mins talking about himself...seriously...do i look like i care?!

jin, mel and i got a tattoo at the bazaar after that! super cheap and cool! haha..cootie got one too..we can all go be gangsters together..

i'm dead tired and i don't know why...listening to everyone telling me about their sweet and pleasant day today...how nice..wish mine was like that too...sigh...good night world..

.

our tattoos...

first day of school...totally enjoyed myself! ya right...i'm definitely lying! i had to drag myself to school this morning..and put myself through 2 torturous 2hr long lectures...this sem is gonna be pretty tough...i just know...the intro lects have already introduced us to the horror that we'll be going through for the remaining 4 months

we have to build a website yet again....this time for e-learning...and of course...brilliant us - equipped with our wonderful IT skills will be able to come up with something splendid..then again.. we might to call our fav M.W.K once again to beg him for help :p

ah the only consoling thing of the whole day...YJ and i chatted with this handsome angmoh in geog lecture!haha..we successfully picked him up..we're brilliant aren't we YJ?! mission accomplished!i couldn't stop smiling to myself for the rest of the evening!haha...and as cootie says...we're on our way to becoming SPFs...haha...

i'm determined to do well this sem! cap 5 here i come! gonna read my readings now! ....ya...who am i kidding man...

caught phantom of the opera today...i must say...i am utterly disappointed. the movie's nothing compared to the real thing. the cast isn't that great...and everything's just not that great. haha...but anyway...i'm crazy over the songs again!

ok other than that...nothing much happened today...

now...for the most important thing....

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY DARLING KUNIES!!!
hope this will be a splendid year for you..as my dad says...you can now VOTE! so please..make the right choice...haha ...whatever...hope you find your yada yada soon...and ermm...may everything be fabulous for you...enjoy adulthood ex-kiddo! and of course..thanks a lot my dear friend for being there for me all the time...listening to my complaints and woes and sorrows..for the jc times, all the hugs, recent car rides, the saturday night outtings, the fun during clubbing, the shopping trips, everything else and of course...for calling me lotus kusu! =)
p.s. i must once again...remind u that i just turned 20, 16 days ago...hahahha!!!


haha...look at happy kunies...waiting for the clock to strike 12 so tt she can see her cake...and who tried to silence us when we loudly announced in IndoChine that she's 21

had dinner with zh, lori and man last night...had a good time talking about our all-time favourite topic..and laughing at all the stuff that happened during primary school! thanks for the chocs ya all! it's super nice!...and the bouncer at zouk confiscated it for a few mins...haha...

as usual...phuture was da bomb...last night was exceptionally good coz we had this huge space to ourselves! zouk was how boring...but nvm...i was kinda disappointed in V while i was in zouk...but after i went to phuture...i was pleased!haha...had a good time...and thanks to V..i slept like a baby when i came home..was kind of expecting myself to not be able to fall asleep...
met many ppl in zouk...and the biggest surprise of all...clarence..he still looks like a teddy bear...haha..

my parents are home with the contractor...and soon the peony painting will be up on the wall...the insurance for M...it had better work...

time's at a standstill today...it's been 7 the whole day...the rain hasn't stopped for a single second, and the sky has been gloomy ever since i don't know when.i've taken numerous naps and now i have nothing else to do...so here i am...blogging once again.

was reading blogs last night and i realised that everyone have been going on about how good or bad..although mostly bad...2004 has been...and how they hope 2005 would be like...so i have to do the same...kidding! haha...all i want to say is...yes 2004 was bad...seriously bad...and i'm glad it's gone...shoo..get lost...good riddance! i hope 2005 will be much better...although...errm... things aren't really looking good eh...with that tsunami and all happening...but well we all have to be optimistic...it'll be a good year! yup! it definitely will!

new year's resolution: to not repeat any of the bad things i did last year...like killing, taking drugs, drinking, robbing....

and so.....
HAPPY 2005 EVERYONE! (and i really mean HAPPY!)

my "oh-s0-exciting" thursday...
i spent the whole afternoon staring at the comp...took 2 naps...ate tons of spaghetti..and then i took out all my unwanted clothes to donate them to the flood victims!now...the exciting part of the whole day was...clearing out my old clothes! my sisters were going crazy trying on all the old and oh-biang clothings that we had,hidden somewhere in our cupboards...and we were laughing like mad...all those hideous prints and weirdly shaped clothes...and the ultimate was the pair of baggy jeans! i couldn't stop laughing when i tried them on! the pants were big enough to stuff at least 5 chickens in them!HAHA! and they are really hideous looking...and i once thought they were cool...sigh...what was wrong with me...heh...anyway after tons of laughter..i made up my mind to keep them...because..they are the ultimate classics...worth keeping..just for the sake of laughter of course! :p

4e dinner last night was good..thanx mich for organising it!:) though we all didn't hang ard together for long...but it was great meeting up and seeing how much everyone has changed!

had quite a fun time at zouk last night!managed to squeeze into phuture with viv, yj, shak, jin and jin's million friends..spent most of the night in phuture...finally after such a long time...zouk should really consider expanding that place! we had a great time dancing until this malay guy with a super poky woolen vest came along with his superb dancing skills and kept banging into us..and we all got kinda pissed after tt...then there was his friend and her splendid dreadlocks that almost poked me to death...man...it sure was an itchy and poky night for me!and i have a pretty cig burn on my hand...courtesy of my good friend jin...but itz ok..she's agreed to pay for my plastic surgery if there's a scar...right???haha...i can't erase the image of jean dancing in zouk..she's really hilarious!all in all...last night was good! :)

time for some photos again!

exactly how i feel about my life right now...LOST!

the new monster in town...the flower monster!

i'm finally 20! haha...well i waited for like how long...not like i am extremely excited tt i've finally hit the big TWO ZERO...but well...i've finally joined all my friends in the TWO ranks already! celebrated it pretty simply...but had a great time...and may i please add...i have a big tummy! what's new? met up with kunies, jin, yj for lunch at kenny rogers and dessert at max brenners...totally couldn't move after tt! thanx a lot for the present ya all! like it a lot! and the bday card's pasted on my pgp room wall now! hehe!

had dinner with my family in china sq after tt...we had some chinese cuisine buffet...yes it caused my tummy to grow even bigger..haha..the food was ok....but the shark fin was crap...there wasn't any shark fin in the "superior double boiled shark fin soup"! cheats!

met up with my "W.E.I.O.O.W" friend(i bet u dunno wad it means cootie..haha!) after tt...we did wad we always do...walk from cinema to cinema looking for some movie to watch..but we ended up in IndoChine..where we finished a whole bottle of white wine...and we went crazy taking photos! haha...hey man...thanx for the crazy time we had in town..and...WE'RE A TEAM!haha!

last night was the first time i spent christmas eve in town! the ppl were going crazy spraying tt canned fake snow stuff on each other and on other ppl's car...and some stupid idiot attacked me! bah! the streets were packed like mad...and was absolutely dirty!i can't imagine wad it'd be like on new yr's eve!



max brenner...yum yum yum!!

the first nice foto that we've ever taken!


look! how artistic!

*so sad...i had to remove my fav foto coz of some particular reasons :(

hohoho...i am back...i am back!Hong Kong was as nice as ever...endless shopping and eating...we ate so much till we compared with each other to see who had a bigger tummy! haha...horrendous us! well this time round i didn't buy any branded stuff...all cheap cheap cheap stuff! we found a million things to buy at the splendid Jardine Street Bazaar...all the cheap belts, cardigans, pullovers...shoes...woooahhh! overwhelming!and....i finally bought my shades...from Loi Yan Gai...i kept calling it Loh Poh Gai and Loh Yan Gai when i was there..my sis almost died of laughter from my stupidity! heh!

anyway..this trip was the best of all the times we went to HK, coz the three of us ventured off on our own..and got lost in the streets of Causeway Bay...there was SO MANY shopping centres....streets and bazaars to check out...and we really got lost in Island Beverly shopping centre...it's like far east...but much more maze like!

oh yes...the most impt point...HK guys are DAMN GOOD LOOKING! we were having a super good time checking them out!hahahah....hum sup us!anyway... they are all TALL! the one factor that most singaporean guys lack...and they all dress damn well...although a bit absurd...and they have such splendid hair and features...omg...i'm convinced...my husband's definitely gonna come from HK! haha!! and...i saw alex to in the HK airport...those dimples.....*melt*

my fav hk food...beef noodles..and breakfast set A..haha

the ruins of st. paul in macau

and of course...the stupid pic of this trip!

ah! we received a splendid christmas hamper from my uncle this morning! a huge piece of ham...log cake, and tt raisin bread thing..and of course wine...yumz...can't wait to eat them!


check it out!

2 nights ago, hilly was telling me about how mean her bf's parents were to make him take the mrt on his own to the airport while the rest of the family took the cab...and i was laughing at how poor thing he was...
and now tonight...my dad happily came out of his room...stood behind my sis and i...and said..."so...tmr 2 of us have to take the mrt to the airport, coz there's no space in the cab...who's gonna volunteer?" and so...i took my eyes off the comp screen and turned to look at my dad and i saw his sinister smile at my sis and i...haha...basket...and i said..."with that look and smile on your face...it seems like we don't really have a choice do we?!" then he went "heh heh...ok so the both of you get to take the train tmr morning"...like it's some kinda honour....bleah...
like i always say...you get what you give...WaGACA i tell u...now i can laugh at myself...at how poor thing i am...sigh...haha...
alright..time to go to bed...coz i have to wake up early to take the train :(

ah it's been a while...and yet i have nothing much to blog about.haven't been doing much...either slack at home, or hang around town...oh...i've found a new place to hang out at! TAMPINES MALL!hahaha! hey it's cool man...everyone should go check out that place...they have a rooftop garden..and some cool playground!i think i've watched almost every single movie that there is...those that are really worth watching are "national treasure" and "world without thieves".sort of expected "world without thieves" to be another one of those disappointing chinese movies..but it turned out to be real nice! absolutely worth my money!

speaking of money...i spend most of my money on food!i'm definitely turning into a pig! i sleep for at least 10 hours a day...and then i laze around or eat for the rest of the day...haha! i suddenly picture myself as some freaking fat ass sitting on a couch, watching the tele and stuffing myself with food all day long *yikes* pretty horrifying! think it's time to go burn some fats!

oh! i cut off my hair! it's really short now...and yes i'm leaving for hk on tues...MORE SHOPPING AND MORE EATING!and now for some photos...

here's what's turning me into a pig...

and our "class gathering" last night...


did i mention that i'm eating this piece of blueberry cake that's full of whipped cream right now?? and that my mom just said that i'm gonna go out of shape soon?? haha...shit...

HONEY....I'M HHHHHOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
haha..i'm home...moved home some of my stuff from pgp...it's that time of the year again.......
time to be a queen...
to grow fat at home...
to laze around all day long....
to watch tv like there's no tomorrow...
to not have to do my own laundry....
to not have to clean my room......
to not have to cook my own meals....
to not have to eat instant mee anymore...
to have good food laid infront of me for every meal
yup..yup..yup...it's that time of the year again!! =)

helped siying move her fridge to my room today...omg...the both of us are mad...we were laughing like mad women throughout the whole way....and were trying to find the best direction to walk in...but we moved it pretty fast i must say! so now...i have a real fridge in my room! haha...and yes my friend...i will definitely fully utilise ur fridgen if i ever go back there!haha! oh...and thanx a lot for ur help on wed night! *wink* haha...thanx to yj and peach too! haha....NO MORE L.I.T!!

when hell breaks loose...all the ghouls who have been caged up in study-hell flock to the cinema....causing a major sell-out at the box office...splendid shows...junk shows...all snapped up way before the show time......and hence.....i didn't get to watch bridget jones or the incredibles....piece-ah-shite...the trouble that we all have to go through these days to watch a movie...we have to book our tickets! the wonders of internet shopping is not thatwonderful afterall...especially so when everyone's catching on with the advanced technology...grrr....

my first day out in town after god knows how long.......i spent a night in town...so many things have changed! but well...all the better...it adds a touch of excitement and interest to orchard road...now i can go explore all the nooks and crannies once again and find new stuff that will amuse me! have u all seen the dancing christmas trees? instead of looking cute...they look kinda stupid...and seriously...the way it sways...it looks like some ppl are in there doing ya know wad...HAHA!

all the beautiful clothes and shoes are tempting me once again....i wish i had more money...actually i wish i had SOME money.....i could only try them on and enjoy the feel of them on my skin...and admire myself in the mirror for tt sheer 5 mins before i had to put them back on the rack again...how utterly saddening. the pretty shoes at x:odus were going at half price...but alas they didn't have my size(as usual)...then there was tt pretty pair of heels in my current fav shop P.O.A...which i can't decide if i shld spend 33 bucks on...then tt goldish satin tank top from XI which i forgot to check out...ahh...i only spent time in heeren and ps ...i have yet to check out far east plaza....i think i shan't...i'll be even more depressed......

well in the end ...i spent like tons of money on yummy food and on stupid cds and vcds...now why the hell did i do tt?! sigh....
now for some fotos...taken with my new Cannon digital ixus 30!HAHAHAHA....



the disgusting remnants of our late dinner....

yeaps...the eggsams are over...and i'm not even delighted.....how come?!?!?! prob coz if2101 and ge2206 were such horrid papers! i hate it when i write rubbish while smoking my way thru the exam. ok.....when we smoke our way thru the exam...it already means we are just talking kok right...but sometimes it can be sensible kok...but this time round itz really plain bullshit...i'm sure of tt...sigh....

itz 12am on a sunday night/monday morning....and i'm sitting here...blogging...watching tv...eating arnott's roasted garlic and parmesan flavoured shapes and drinking a bottle of hoe garden...at home......how sad is that?! exams barely ended yest and i'm already so darn bored.......which brings me to another pt...why the hell am i drinking beer?!

wonder wad i'm gonna do for the hols...the only thing i'm certain of is tt i'll bug my parents everyday...and make them let me drive the car...haha

oh...i went for jay chou's concert last night...though i'm not a super big fan of his....i must say his concert is definitely worth the money! i was expecting him to sing out of tune during the live performance...but he was really good...he is as thick skinned as sammi i must say...haha..his canto is horrid, but he's really super good at the piano! he and this other guy from nan quan mama played "bumble bee" together...and their fingers were flying!! i was stunned! the whole performance's really good...there were 2 guest stars...nan quan mama and landy...there was tt super good piano performance...and a short performance by a dj and a drummer..but the drummer was horrid la...he was outta rhythm for a large part of the time that he was performing for.....the crowd was splendid too (much more enthu than those at sammi's concert)! when the lights went off in the stadium..the light from the lightsticks tt everyone was carrying was so nice! we spent like half the performance without lightsticks...but coz we were missing out on the fun i went out to buy two! haha..it's pretty amazing how everyone just stood up and started singing and swaying along to the music..for a moment i felt like i was part of some cult worshipping some dunno wad...haha...overall...the concert was a blast!

damn...i'm such a chatterbox..when i can't find ppl to talk to, i come and yak on my blog...hahaha...

well well...i'm a very happy girl tonight! coz bala called me just now! hahah...aren't you touched that i'm talking abt u on my blog bala? hehe...anyway...pls remember to call ninja pok and arrange a time soon so tt she can HHHHHHHAAAAIIIII YAAAAA!! some ppl...and do u still need the help of my assassins? by the way..can u pls buy something for me when u come back? how abt the white belt that i didn't buy?? hehe...and i am still very angry with u for not letting me buy the nike shirt tt time...everytime i see peter wear it then i will regret that i didn't buy it! grrrrr.....

i forgot to mention that sulin's back! WELCOME BACK SU SU!! meet up after my exams ya...and when lao niang comes back we can have our family gathering! :)

ok...back to my tv...

beer belly...*burp*

yes! yet another down...2 more papers to go...4 days to freedom..can't wait! ge2218 wasn't that fabulous today..starting to wonder if it was a bad choice to have chosen qn6, but whatever it is...it's over...the only thing i can do now's pray that i'll do well :S

hah..after the paper we slacked like as though exams were over!...jin, hil, mel, chia, peter, this other friend of theirs whom i think's called justin, n i spent 2 hrs plus in munchie monkeys eating pasta, pizza and dessert...chatting and reading magazines..and it sure felt like exams were over..until suddenly someone mentioned that she didn't feel like studying...then we all remembered that we still had papers coming up...sigh.... oh...we even had beer! haha..after only one cup..peter, justin, hil n i were all red in the face...how embarrassing!

now that i'm thinking about it...it felt like as though we were studying overseas...with the heavy rain outside..super cold weather...slacking in a bistro with no worries about the next paper....a beer in the middle of the day....hah...tt sure is the best kinda life to lead!

anyway..i came back and had the longest nap ever in a long time...2 hours...had my yummy nasi briyani dinner...and now i'm refreshed! in fact...i still feel like slacking...heh :P

oh...some guy took a foto of us and said he'll put it on the board in munchies...i hope it gets lost somewhere...:S

sometimes when i talk to you...i'm scared..
you seem to not have any feelings...your eyes have no emotions...
they seem hard and cold....void of compassion
or do they convey negative feelings?
you don't show any care or concern...
i can't read what you're thinking...
i can't tell if your words are true...or if they hide other meanings
i'm afraid to ask these days...i'm afraid to hear the answer...
i sense reluctance all the time...
suddenly you seem so distant
i don't know you anymore..

death and old age

isn't it sad..to know that when we grow old...we either die peacefully in our sleep...or we lose our ability to do everything, and we sit around everyday waiting for our death day to come? that's what henny went through...and i guess that's what my grandma's going through too...much as i dislike her...i think it's sad to have to live the last years of your life in this way. not being able talk, walk, or eat...it's as good as being dead. all of a sudden i fear death...what happens to us after we die? how does it feel to be cremated? ....how does dying feel like?? ...have you ever made a list of the people whom you think would cry for you at your funeral?...or who would even attend your funeral?...how many lives have you touched in your living days? would you die in grace...or would you die in shame? at your funeral...would people say..."she was just such a fine person...what a pity that she's gone"...or would people say..."there..the world's rid of yet another pest"...?

before death comes old age...having to grow old is the scariest thing on earth...it's even scarier than death..than walking through a haunted house...or lizards :P... i always have this sinking feeling in me when i see old people sitting around without any other aim in their lives. as i sat in the restaurant observing a group of old men and women (all of them are at least 70 yrs old)...i smiled at the fact that though they are old,they are still able to go on a holiday...sit around eating and chatting happily with each other...but yet deep inside...there was this indescribable sadness as i looked at their wrinkled faces, white hair, thin frail frames and hunched backs. it's nice to be old and happy...but it's just sad to be old.

==========

i'm such a weakling...i crumble so easily...it's only been two days..and i feel it creeping back again...i'm not determined enough...

henny penny aka fei gao

weekends are disastrous...our bodies are just tuned to not do work..and that's exactly what happened over the weekend..i only did 4 readings...which means...i'm officially dead for the day

my dog's gone =( ...he had to be put to sleep. he was so old, that he couldn't walk, and he couldn't do anything...and the ants and flies started to attack him one morning. i'm sad that the last time i saw him was two weeks ago...and when i called him he couldn't even hear me (he's been deaf and pretty blind for quite a long time) =( i'm sad that i didn't dare to touch him for a year because i was afraid he would bite me...which he liked to do since i don't know when.

i suddenly miss the days...when i used to play with him (when he didn't have the habit of biting people)...when he used to throw tantrums cause he was being punished for peeing on the car or on the pillars...when i used to secretly give him part of my breakfast every morning...when he had the energy to jump and wag his tail at the sight of food...when i woke up in the morning to find the front page of the straits times shredded to pieces..when he would sit smartly infront of the gate at 5pm everyday waiting for the children from the childcare centre to walk pass and shower him with attention by going "hallooo!!","doggieeeee!!!","woof wooff!!","so cute!!"...when i used to come home everyday from school and shout "FEI GAO!!!" and he would circle around my legs (but i think after awhile he realised what fei gao meant, coz he got pretty angry with me for calling him that...)...when i used to laugh like mad when he drenched my mom with water or fart in her face whenever she bathed him!..when i used to take the floor cloth and wrap him up in it because i thought it made him look like a cute baby bundled up in a blanket...when i used to put the floor cloth over his head and he wouldn't dare to move for 5 sec..haha..ok i am quite evil...but well he had his fair share of revenge by scratching my legs with his long sharp nails and breathing his bad breath in my face...

but those days are now gone....and now when i return home..i wouldn't even get to shout HENNYYY or FEEIII GAOOO anymore..coz he wouldn't be there =( ... bye bye henny...bye bye fei gao....



and yet another part of my life's gone...this time round...i didn't do anything to cause it...

argh! they are invading our planet!...they don't stop coming do they?!
these pesky little insects that only appear when it rains heavily....

armed with her newly acquired lethal weapon...B.G...also known as BAYGON [All Insect Killer...Fast Knockdown and Long Lasting Action]..she slowly creeps up to them and sprays a lethal dose on each of them! hur hur...
every now and then she'll decide to spare their lives...by catching them by their wings and releasing them out of the window or the door...
but alas...these insolent little creatures do not know how precious life is...they fly right back through the doors of the BAYGON chamber...
"so...you really are seeking death aren't ya? well...to hell with you then..."..and so...one by one...they receive their delicious dose of BAYGON!
after killing about a dozen of them...guilt and compassion starts to set in...n she decides to spare the lives of the next few that wander into the gas chamber...but...they do not know their limits! they attempt to molest GOOD-LUCK BEAR! how dare they!?
too bad for u...u idiotic things...ur lives will not be spared! didn't ur mama teach ya not to mess with good-luck bear?!.... pssssssssssttttttttt......
....and they get bolder and bolder each time...the next one enters the wonderfully scented air wick container..and gets itz retarded self caught in the beautiful aqua gel...destroying that beautiful piece of art...
...another attempts to climb up her leg...and loses all it's wings in her powerful hands(HAHA)...
...and of course the most idiotic of the lot attempts suicide by crawling under the magnificent cool ridge bottle and squashes itself to death...
brainless insects.....!!!
....wait a min...all of a sudden, the insect buster's feeling kinda woozy.....damn.....not only does BAYGON kill flying and crawling insects...it also kills humans when used in huge amounts......
...........................SHIT...........................

som's driving me nuts...but i'm finally done with my wonderful composition! i'm definite that i can be the next mozart, or beethoven, or mahler, or wagner, or whoever else...hoho...

WOOOHOOO! i am in my best mood ever for the whole of this sem! don't ask me why...coz i dunno either...i just feel damn good! hehe...itz the first day in blardee long that i've not had any kinda of horrible feeling in me...despite the fact tt i had horrid SC2214 paper this afternoon...which marks the end of blardee freaking hell politics and propaganda..the thing i dread most after econs(cheers to jin, hil and viv who bravely faced politics with me this sem!)... and an som composition to hand up tmr...yikes! but nonetheless...i'm in a damn good moood!!! feel like dancing!! by the way...vhat is fascist aesthetics?? was telling jin b4 the paper that if it ever appears in the paper...i'm definitely gonna skip tt qn...and indeed i did...even though i very much wanted to write abt leni and disgusting ndp =(

yo darling...u get wad ya give...so i'm gonna give u wad ya gave! hohohohoho!

oh i thought of the stupidest thing while doing my big business just now(not like anyone needed to know tt)...but anyway...was reading 8 days and i read this comment abt Daphne that she's "pretty but boring...like a vase"...then i was thinking of what would be the opposite of that saying...so i settled with "ugly but full of surprises...like an old couch"...n hence my nick for da night..."u are like a vase...pretty but boring...on the other hand...i am like an old couch...ugly but full of surprises!!" as for that fella who said i'm full of nasty surprises...ya watch out i tell ya! haha! nasty or not...at least i'm full of surprises...ya boring cootie...ok kidding la huh!!

and this song has been on repeat mode for the entire night...SHACKLES( PRAISE YOU) by Mary Mary...jin just told me tt they are gospel singers..never knew that...but the song's exactly how i feel right now! errr i dunno if itz God who liberated me from all tt sorrows...but wadeva...whoever it is...praise you!!

Whoo!
It sure is hot out hereYa know?
I don't mind though
Just glad to be great
Know what I'm saying, uh!

Take the shackles off my feet so I can dance
I just wanna praise you
(What'cha wanna do?)
I just wanna praise you
(Yeah, yeah)
You broke the chains now I can lift my hands
(Uh feel me?)
And I'm gonna praise you
(What'cha gon do?)
I'm gonna praise you

In the corners of my mind
I just can't seem to find a reason to believe
That I can break free
Cause you see I have been down for so long
Feel like the hope is gone
But as I lift my hands, I understand
That I should praise you through my circumstance

Take the shackles off my feet so I can dance
I just wanna praise youI just wanna praise you
You broke the chains now I can lift my hands
And I'm gonna praise you
I'm gonna praise you

Everything that could go wrong
All went wrong at one time
So much pressure fell on me
I thought I was gon lose my mind
But I know you wanna see
If I will hold on through these trials
But I need you to lift this load
Cause I can't take it anymore

Take the shackles off my feet so I can dance
I just wanna praise you
I just wanna praise you
You broke the chains now I can lift my hands
And I'm gonna praise you
I'm gonna praise you

Been through the fire and the rain
Bound in every kind of way
But God has broken every chain
So let me go right now

Take the shackles off my feet so I can dance
I just wanna praise you
I just wanna praise you
You broke the chains now I can lift my hands
And I'm gonna praise you
I'm gonna praise you

Take them off
What'cha gonna do, yeah
Take the shackles off my feet so I can dance
I just wanna praise you
I just wanna praise you
You broke the chains now I can lift my hands
And I'm gonna praise you
I'm gonna praise you

B-E-A-UUUUUUTIFUL!!

捨不得你 　
　 　
回頭再看我的最初
尋尋覓覓活在迷惘
多得您引領我
天天您亦為我
令我找到片段亮光

完全怪我要一試高飛
完全是為著令人生更美
珍惜您愛過您
感激您念掛您
無奈到最後要分離

過去的絲絲記憶繞困我的心
我卻要掙扎離去

我捨不得您
無奈我要創造未來共您
普普通通的去愛
未夠我獨個精彩

我捨不得您
無奈我有我的未來願您
找到心中最深刻的愛
永不更改全心我祝福您

再見了
遠去了
尋求未了願
愛過了放棄了
全是自己挑選

過去了
我去了
揚翔是我願
別日日或夜夜
亦在為我心酸

my favourite song by sammi...so sad...
*i'm amused at how i can post chinese words!!!*

I'M GOING CRAZY!!!
i'm dead tired...but when i lie down..i can't get to sleep
i got a million things to do...but i can't focus
i'm hungry...but i feel sick when i eat...
when i'm alone...i feel the need for company
when i'm with people...i feel irritated
one min i am laughing...next min i am frustrated
i'm starting my long walks again....but they aren't helping this time round
i feel stressed...yet i can't get myself to work...i don't know where to start...or what to do....
i'm LOST
aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrggggghhhhhhhh...........somebody save me!

i snapped. was right when i said that it would be soon...
when i'm angry i do 4 things...i either cry out of anger, scold someone damn badly, take a walk or lie down and close my eyes till i calm down...this time round i snapped at someone and took a 30 min walk after that......

is it good to tolerate? is it fair to the person...if we just tolerate until the point when we can no longer take it, then we snap at them? i dunno. in a fit of anger...i said it's fair...but after thinking it through...i guess it's not. peach may be right when she said it's not fair that we do not give people any warning that we are not happy with things and then all of a sudden we just explode at them.

i guess everything just accumulated inside till the point where there was no more space..and so i exploded. i hate the way i handle things. i hate the way i let things get to me...and i hate the way they keep revolving around in my head.
to the person whom i snapped at...i'm sorry that it had to be you.

there are certain points in your life..when something or someone enters...and you are so caught up working on things that you just neglect every other thing and everyone else who once played a large part in your life. you concentrate so much on that thing or person...and everything else seems to be shadowed from your eyes...or shelved somewhere at the back of your head.then one day...something happens and whatever you were caught up with goes wrong and...for a period of time after that..you'll feel lost and down in the dumps...and have absolutely no idea which direction to head towards. then one fine day..you suddenly start thinking of all the things you used to do which you haven't been doing...all the people whom you have neglected...and then you feel guilty for being so selfish and regret what you did...all that precious time lost. you start missing all of them and all the good times you used to have. you go back to doing what you once did...you call up the people whom you've neglected..and realise that they are still there..were always there(inevitably some may be lost)..and you realise how blessed you are. when all these happen...you know that you've surfaced from the abyss...everything bad's gonna be left behind..and maybe this time you're gonna move on with life for real. :)

songwriters these days are fantastic...they really write about anything and everything under the sun. i managed to find a song for every single thing that i was going through...or that reflected all my thoughts and feelings.i'm amused!i've never ever payed attention to the lyrics of a song...but recently every song that i hear seems to be extremely meaningful...ok except for some hip-hop n rnb songs...err those are only nice to dance along with..like "boo", "mother *beep*", "nigga" can mean anything to me.oh then there are chinese songs...really meaningful too..although sometimes i really catch no ball..but wadeva it is...pls pay attention to the lyrics of songs these days...coz some of them are really meaningful...if i posted my playlist...i wouldn't even have to open my mouth to speak...the songs will do the job for me!

so many things are easier said than done...the ideal can hardly be achieved most of the time
how the human mind works and how we let our feelings control ourselves seem to be the most puzzling thing by far
we go through every single day of our lives as though we are acting in a play...constantly putting on different masks - hiding behind them and never being able to express our true feelings
the words we speak don't always hold the truth
we speak in circles, dropping subtle hints every now and then hoping that the other party catches them
how can we smile even though it's not a genuine one?
why is it that when we are hurt...we always speak to everyone but the one that caused it?
how easy is it to forget things and move on with life?
is it fair to make use of others as a substitute just to forget ur own problems?
why are we always blind to what's standing right infront of our eyes waiting to be appreciated...instead we desire the things we can never lay our hands on?
when can we find the answers to all these questions??...

==========

guess the time has really arrived...faster than expected

that little hope that still existed has totally disappeared this time round

maybe things will get better from now onwards

it's time to walk away..good bye. good luck. for real

VANCOUVER!!!!

just felt like saying tt...hahahahaha
now..i'll try to study...sigh..

anger, violence and i

man...my butt's flat and wide...sat at munchie monkeys for 10 hrs today...studying...napping...eating...stonning...i'm poofed!

so much to do n yet so little time.

i'm a very angry person.keep experiencing waves of anger throughout the day.i wish i could punch someone...any of those people who are currently on my punch list...i bet i'll feel good. i had a very violent dream tt night..i dreamt tt i thrashed someone's room and slapped two people...kinda funny eh...but the scary thing was i felt very good when i woke up...haha..
there's gotta be a way to vent all these pent up anger...talking doesn't work anymore..running does...but it's not satisfying enough...

my temper now as compared to the past is extremely good i must say...but all tt controlling is taking it's toll on me! one of these days i'll just snap...and i think itz gonna be soon...

just got back from a run tt took 3 hrs ...and a nice long bath =) i feel good! haha...i always reflect on the entire day's happenings when i take my nightly baths...and then i'll think of stuff to write abt in my blog...so yes..here i am blogging...since i am in the mood!

all my tests are over...and i'm done with som! phew...now i can get down to studying for REAL!
as for the two tests today...i'll be happy if i pass...crap

was yakking with viv n hil when their fren came along and sat down to yak with us...and something he said really made me laugh...it's the funniest thing anyone has ever said in a long time....he was talking abt how this yr's 19 year old girls suck...and how irritating they are(finally...a guy with eyes that function..and brains that think..ha chan..now u can't say this guy thinks with ya know wad)...hahhaha...i can't help but agree with him (betta say this just in case...not referring to anyone in particular)....
what's with the pink and green hair, big plastic earrings and hordes of mismatched accessories??yes...we know tt teen vogue promotes such fashion(e accessories and not the hair of course..)..but being daring and outstanding is one thing ...looking terrible is also another...acting cute(e.g. whining) and behaving like u are damn cool or have some kinda attitude should be confined to your secondary sch days...as much as we love declaring that we were once from girls schools...some stuff that we used to do, should really be contained within those 10 years....
ok...not all of them behave this way...but MOST of them do....all in all...GROW UP...ur freaking gonna hit TWO ZERO next year!

ok...end of bitch fest...time to reward myself with the last epi of OC...

DUDE

i suddenly thought of what's his name this morning...and "yo dude".."hey dude".. keeps repeating in my head for the rest of the day.....
he says it in the funniest way....yo DOOD...hey DOOD..haha..and so now i too am addicted
and yes..there's also du-de..which is his chinese name... i'll never forget tt! haha!
now...seriously...what's his name?!

all the memories of tt relaxing 2 weeks in melb are coming back...i wish i was there now...far away from everything...those there seriously dunno how fortunate they are....
i've decided...i'll apply for sep....i'm getting out of here...from everything and everyone

and yes...we can all tell how bored i am these days from the no. of times i blog...not like my huge BORED AND GOING CRAZY doesn't say it all...but seriously...i'm really going mad
som and icm test tmr..itz 3am...and i'm nowhere near finishing...and i've been at it for the whole week...i'm screwed.

ahah! i remember now..perry's the name!

hey man...stop lying to urself dude..
it makes my stomach churn everytime...and right now..i feel like puking
but what will come out? nothing...
honey grahams suddenly taste gross...i've lost my appetite for the rest of the day
urgh i hate this feeling...bllllleeeeaaaaaahhhhhhh....cough...choke...gurgle...nope still nothing..
maybe i shld go stick my finger down my throat...
get a hold of yourself!!

BORED

and

GOING CRAZY!!!!!

Afrodisiac - Brandy

Ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Whatever you want, I got it, Papi
Don't hesitate, holla at me!
What I'm lookin' for
Is simple, you see
Love and support and sexuality
When I'm with you,
I don't wanna leave
I need you just like air that I breathe

But when I'm not with you,
I'm missing my peace
I got a lot inside I need to release
You fulfill my every desire
When I'm with you, you take me higher (Wooo woo whoo)

[CHORUS:]
You're my afrodisiac
You're the only one I'm needin'
When I go, I'll come back
'Cause there is no way I'm leavin'

You're my afrodisiac
You're the only one I'm needin'
When I go, I'll come back
'Cause there is no way I'm leavin'

There is no way you are gettin' away
I need your love every day
Medicine can't cure the way that I feel
What I need is my inner fill
Being without you, its makin me ill
Stressin me out i need to chill
Something this strong, gotta be real
Nothing or noone, show my skills
You fulfill my every desire
When I'm with you, you take me higher (Wooo woo whoo)

[CHORUS]

I admit that I'm a prisoner of your sex appeal(sex appeal)
I can't seem to find a way to escape how i feel(how i feel)
I can't wait no longer, please come give a dose to me(dose to me)
Breathin's gettin stronger need you now, close to me

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

itz raining again...the breeze is so nice...ok i change my mind...it just blew my fotos off my notice board!!...typhoon more like it....

*burp*rocky road and kopitiam bread ...yummm..
i'm studying....for real this time...not stonning but studying!except for now...itz break time!

lunch at the club n grocery shopping tmr! yay! poor fridge and cupboard are empty =(
let's see...there's a whole container of mcvites, 3 muesli bars, 3 packs of instant noodles, 1 bottle of pipa gao, a little bit of milk, 3 eggs, 2 crab sticks, 1 mini fruit and nuts bar......and...errr....5 cans of beer...haha
oh...and a container of rice..

yes! maggie the irritating/sarcastic/unfunny bitch is finally off...now i can finally have some good music on p98!

==========

yikes! they are everywhere! they're invading our world!!where do all the bugs come from??we can open a bug museum in pgp...the wide variety of bugs we get here.....

spider...beetle...ladybird...cockroach...moth...and the list goes on...

there it hangs...on a thin thread...right outside my window...it looks so weak and vulnerable..but yet it can withstand the power of the rubberband i shot at it! tt hive out there better not produce anything tt will come into my room to sting me...coz i am being kind by not taking a 2nd attempt at knocking it down....those parent bugs better be grateful tt i'm sparing the lives of their offsprings!

==========

i'm in a very good mood today...try to spoil it and i swear u won't see daylight again!

and so itz e end...

nice....

• family
• girlfriends
• diamond
• ipod
• adam brody
• samaire armstrong
• black pepper chicken chop
• grilled fish
• ice cream
• coke

they must have been lying when they said you were nice.coz i've never seen it all before.maybe once upon a time..but not anymore.but who am i to judge?for i am no better..or am i?

i had a dream........

i dreamt tt sylvester got kicked out of singapore idols!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA....
if it comes true.......TOO BAD FF!!

i have the attention span of a 5 yrs old kid! sigh...i only read 4 pages of icm..and here i am back at the laptop! grrrrrrrr

i think i am a pretty good cook! haha...
cooked pasta and clam chowder with viv, yj, shiau hui and hil last night as a bday celebration dinner for hil!
and tonight...i attempted to cook claypot lap chiong rice with egg...but errm...of course i did not have a clay pot...so i had to settle with the metal pot!...and itz not bad...it even has those burnt rice at the bottom of the pot...how authentic?! hahhahahah...ok ok..it was edible..and there's some leftover..any takers??

sigh...17 more days to exams..and i am happily taking my own sweet time to do my revision!...congratulations to myself =(

bad news...the OC hater aka me...is now addicted to OC too!haha..yes slow...but itz damn nice i must say...seth is a blardee joker and a very hot one too...ryan looks like an ah pek but cute in a stupid way...summer is as irritating as i dunno wad...anna's absolutely pretty and marissa...i still hate her...poor ppl look! hahahhahahah...i wish had parents like sandy and kirsten (not tt i'm not happy with mine =p)...and i'm glad i don't have parents who are like julie and jimmy cooper

ok ok..back to work......

oh a leetle late but...HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY HILLIE THE HORSIE aka HORSE ON WHEELS!