a good one that my colleague sent me

"True Friendship"

(With none of that Sissy Crap!!!!)
Are you tired of those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good, but
never actually come close to reality. Well, here is a series of promises that
actually speak of true friendship. You will see no cutesy little smiley
faces on this card - Just the stone cold truth of our great friendship.

1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against
the sorry bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid.

4. When you are scared -- I will take the piss out of you about it every
chance I get.

5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much
worse it could be until you quit whining.

6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.

7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again.
I don't want catch whatever you have.

8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.

9. This is my oath..... I pledge it to the end. "Why?" you may ask; "because
you are my friend".

Friendship is like peeing in your pants, everyone can see it, but only you
can feel the true warmth.

And remember.... when life hands you Lemons, ask for tequila, salt and
call me over!!!!!